Instead of the usual blurb about how hot Renata is, here's some truth. I grew up in a third world country, where Richard Dean Anderson's MacGuyver was the role model for all teenagers in the mid-2000s and you paid by the minute for Internet even a few years ago. We didn't have porn. We had religion. I don't need to tell you that the ladies, while beautiful in the way a painting is beautiful, didn't have much going on in the way of sex appeal. (Seriously--have you ever wanted to ejaculate on Mona Lisa's breasts?)

My friends and I would congregate in open air markets, although I've heard that they have an air conditioned mall now. One of the rituals of becoming a man--or at least hitting puberty--is you would buy two posters. One would go on the outside of your bedroom door, meant to reflect what kind of man you were--I had The A Team and Ozzy's Bark at the Moon, to show that, while I was a no-nonsense name-taker like Mr. T, I had a more sensitive musical side. But on the inside of your bedroom door would be the image that you would see. Every night before you went to sleep, every morning when you woke up.

I had a picture of some model with her midriff bared and sitting on a chair like that picture of Renata. I didn't know her name, although she took on the name of every girl I fell in love with. I have an old photo of my room and looking at that, I don't think she was half as hot or beautiful in the face as Renata. But for the life of me, I couldn't tell you just how many times, between the ages of 14 and 18, I dreamed of having that woman in my arms.

It's good to remember, in this tumultuous year, that we live in the greatest country in the world. We have our disagreements as a nation, but the fact that we're allowed to have them is what makes everything so awesome. And the fact that, if you're an average guy with an average income and you share every man's fantasy, then you don't have to stay up nights staring at a cheap printout on the back of your bedroom door while Anjan Dutt's "2441139" plays on your pirated cassette player. You can have the real thing.

Age : 24 Ethnicity : Latina
Weight : 125lbs Tattoo :
Height : 5'5 Rate : 350
Hair : Brunette Services : GFE
Breast : 34D enhanced

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